Wednesday, March 30, 2011

My Dad

My dad and Carol met with Hospice yesterday.  I hate knowing my dad is in pain.  I hate knowing that he won't always be here for me to hug and joke around with.  But, I also know that he doesn't like me to be sad.  So, I am trying to focus on all the wonderful memories I have of him and let them fill me with his love.

  • When I was a little girl, he was in charge of putting my socks on before church one Sunday.  I remember vividly how I laughed because he didn't have the knack of putting socks on like mom and it tickled my feet.
  • For years my dad was a tea drinker.  After work he would make a huge glass of instant tea with sugar.  He always seemed to have the right combination and I loved taking drinks from his cup.
  • My dad always wore cowboy boots.  However, he once bought a pair of Kangaroo tennis shoes (they had a little zipper pocket on them).  He tried them on when he got home and challenged us to a race.  It was the only time I ever remember my dad racing us and I LOVED it.
  • When I was upset, I always went to my room or somewhere outside.  My dad would always find me.
  • When I was 13 years old my dad taught me how to drive.  The two of us would wake up early, go to mass, and then he would take me out to country roads and I would drive.  Sometimes we would get home and everyone would still be asleep or at mass and he would make his special hash browns, eggs and bacon.  I was a little disappointed when my lessons were over.
  • My mom worked as a part-time nurse when we were growing up.  She worked every Wednesday night.  These were special nights because my dad let us stay up late and watch TV. 
  • My dad always had a way of making us see the other person's side of view, even when we really didn't want to.
  • When my parents got divorced I was an adult.  My dad always encouraged me to have a good relationship with my mom (I am glad I do!  She too is an awesome person) and even after their divorce, continued to admire her strengths.
  • I set my dad up on a blind date with Carol over 17 years ago. All four of us went out to dinner on their first date.  Carol was a teacher friend of mine.  They hit it off immediately and now she is my mom friend.  I have loved watching their relationship blossom. 
  • He always makes sure I have food that is gluten and dairy free. 
  • When I visit Wichita now that we have moved away, my special time with my dad is early in the morning.  We are both up and spend several hours sitting and talking. 
  • My dad is not a dog lover.  In fact, he has always been afraid of dogs.  However, he allowed me to bring Izzy into his house and was able to see her wonderful characteristics. 
  • I have always felt like my dad's "favorite" child.  What I have realized over the years is that each of us six kids are his "favorite" in our own unique way.  I love that he always makese me feel so special.
Being far away from home is hard.  Being away from home when one of your parents is sick is really hard.  I am comforted by the almost daily texts I get from Carol keeping me up to date on my dad.  I know my life will always be a better place because of the influence he has had on me.  Please pray/send comforting thoughts that Hospice can help make his days more pleasurable.

8 comments:

  1. carlascorner.wordpress.comMarch 30, 2011 at 8:25 AM

    Cathy: Indeed, my thoughts are with you and your family at this time. Your post clearly points out that the memories we make today are the ones we cherish tomorrow. You certainly built some wonderful memories with your dad.

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  2. What lovely memories, Cathy. My heart goes out to you, you're going through such a difficult time. Keep strong!

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  3. What a beautiful post. It's always the small things that matter the most. The things that he did for you and never thought about them again.

    You and your dad have been on my mind and I know he had to be a special guy to make all 6 of his children feel like they were his favorite.

    I hope hospice keeps your dad comfortable and your memories fill you with peace.

    Hugs, my friend.

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  4. I know from experience how hard this time is for you. But, oh, Cathy, what lovely memories you have of your father. You're so wise to focus on these, rather than on only your sadness and sense of impending loss.

    It's wonderful that we have the technology now to be able to keep up, long distance, with family. Having those texts from Carol, daily, must really give you a lot of comfort.

    Sending you warm, comforting hugs and quiet calm, Cathy. And please, don't forget to care for yourself in the coming days, okay?

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  5. This is a great post Cathy. I only hope my daughter will have half as much good things to remember about me.

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  6. (((Cathy,))) what a great tribute to your dad. Make sure you tell him some of those things. Losing a wonderful father is difficult. I hope that hospice makes it a little easier for your whole family. Many hugs.

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  7. Hi Cathy,as a reader of your blog that has always enjoyed and learnt from what you write,wants to send you a big hug and I'll be praying for your wonderful dad, so that he is with no pain and relaxed.you are not alone many unknown people that reads you are hear for you and will join you on pray.
    with love
    silvina

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  8. Just been reading back. Such a shame. What a lovely man your Dad was. And what wonderful, cherished memories.

    The simple things in life are indeed all that matter.

    Your dad would be proud. You sound a lovely daughter

    x

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