Saturday, November 19, 2016

What I Be Project/Joint Decisions Summit 2016


 “I am not my details.” 

In October, I had the privilege of attending the third Joint Decisions Blogger Summit. This year, we met in Philly, the city of Brotherly Love. So, we had to talk self-love! Many amazing things happened, we toured Janssen Pharmaceutical's lab (AMAZING EXPERIENCE), had great speakers share information on self-love, ate a lot, and we met Steve J Rosenfield, creator and photographer of the What I Be Project. Steve was very laid back and explained the purpose of the project, "The 'What I Be Project' is a social experiment turned into, what is now, a global movement about honesty and empowerment. In today’s society, we are often told to look or act a certain way. If we differ from these “standards,” we are often judged, ridiculed, bullied and sometimes even killed over them. I started this project in hopes to open up the lines of communication, and to help everyone accept diversity with an open mind & heart and empower those who feel they suffer for something they may see as a flaw."

Our goal at the summit was to write down a few insecurities we have about ourselves. With everyone in the room having rheumatoid arthritis, that was easy. But I think we were able to look outside of the obvious and into some deep things. For me, it ended up being that I am not a detail oriented person. I try hard, but in general, I don't care about details. They bore me. However, there are consequences to not having an interest in details. The one that often bothers me the most is I feel inferior because I don't have details to spout out and often have to reeducate myself on the same details again and again. I am a feelings person. I realize that about myself, but feelings aren't always the goal of a get together. I find that in my profession, my strengths work well because I help students to feel comfortable in a classroom setting they haven't been in for years, but around other teachers, I can feel like I just don't have enough information to share. My information gets stored in my heart as feelings and observations, not in my mind as informational facts.

I am going to be honest, I felt a little vulnerable doing this project which surprised me. As a feelings person, this is my kind of thing. I shared one other insecurity with Steve, in private, but this is the one I knew has been lifelong and one that I brought with me to the summit. Being part of the Joint Decisions team is so awesome, but as I pack up to go, this insecurity always jumps in my bag and follows me to the summits because I know I will be sitting in a roomful of some of the most professional RA bloggers ever who seem to know EVERYTHING. How do people keep so many details in their brains???

In the end, I loved this project and it has stayed with me. When I met privately with Steve, I left feeling like a weight had been lifted. Finally I had shared this with someone else. He made me feel so at ease that I wanted to sit and tell him every insecurity I had!  When everyone had met with him, he presented the entire group's photos. WOW! WOW! WOW! I wasn't alone. We all have hidden insecurities. It was empowering to know other strong people in the group felt scared, worried, and alone. Plus, I have noticed by owning this insecurity, I have actually felt a little more okay with it. In a recent job review I even mentioned it as a weakness and felt okay with it. It was almost like the insecurity had been owned and them its magnitude reduced so I could focus on more of what I am doing right.  

I love these people! 
My favorite take-away from the summit was meeting with a friend who had a terrible appointment with her surgeon. I found myself saying, "Things are changing. Patients are gaining a voice." This is what Joint Decisions gives me. I feel like I have a voice as a patient.

3 comments:

  1. I love seeing these photos from those of you went to this event. It’s so incredibly powerful. And as someone who has worked very closely with you, I’d like to say that you not caring about certain things is one of your most powerful strengths. When I work with you, you get me out of my head and connected to my instincts. This is an incredible gift to someone like me who tends to get stuck in their head and have no idea what's going on with the rest of their soul.

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  2. I also felt vulnerable doing it but was so happy I went forward. I knew precisely what the word would be once the project was introduced. but frankly I had to decide, how might my sons and grandchildren someday see that photo? I am glad I went ahead.

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