Saturday, August 29, 2009

Winning Streak is Over (For Now)

My winning streak with rheumatoid arthritis has come to an end for now. A week of rainy weather in the Chicago area has left me limping again and awake with a shoulder that won't stop throbbing. What makes the shoulder pain hurt more than anything else? I have a fairly high tolerance for pain, but this is unbearable. My only hope at the moment is that the pain in my shoulder is generally short lived.

I feel like rheumatoid arthritis has taken control of my life right now. It has sucked the positive thoughts out of my mind and replaced them with feelings of frustration, loss and panic. I know the visions of a healing body are within me, but right now they are hiding. They are afraid of being hurt, afraid of being let down. So for the moment, I will let them hide deep within me where they are safe so that they can come out in a few days and motivate me to keep going again.