Who Feels Good Today?

It's Me! It's Me! I feel better today than I have in a really long time. Maybe it is the excitement of my sister Stacey coming for a visit today. Wish me luck that the good feeling continues.

Optimism

Yesterday morning Alexander asked how I was doing. I said, "Not too good." Sophia piped up with, "That's okay because the day before you had a really good day." She keeps me motivated and won't let me feel sorry for myself. She always thinks about the good. Good news for today is I am feeling better!!!!

Izzy, Our Border Collie

A little over a year ago, this beautiful Border Collie joined our family. I have to admit that in the last year, there have been times that I wondered if we took on more than we could handle. She is a smart, energetic dog that has challenged us on many levels. However, she has brought so much good into our lives that it is difficult to imagine not having her. We always tell her, "you were made just for us." I really do believe it is true. Having Izzy in my life has renewed a patience I haven't had to use since my kids were young, she makes me think, she is my nap partner, she follows me wherever I go, she gets me and/or the kids out walking every day and the time we put into training her is so rewarding when she can show off her tricks for company. Best of all, I have met so many wonderful friends because of Izzy. We now can walk through our neighborhood and people wave to us. Of course we are only known as Izzy's owners, but that is okay. We have met encouraging dog trainers that have supported us through many tears. Our Izzy has opened up a whole new world to us!

Farewell Kisses

Anytime Alexander or Sophia say good-bye to me, even for something as little as a walk around the neighborhood or a quick run to the store, they give me hugs and kisses. One time a visitor was here and said, "Geez, she isn't going to war." I like that they treat every separation as if we may never see each other again and that they want to make that connection to me each and every time we separate. It is nice to have a grand farewell and know that you are missed even if it is for only a few minutes. And when I come home, it is awesome to be greeted at the door by two smiling faces!

Why go natural?

Many may wonder why I have decided to go back to my natural hair color. Well, here are a few good reasons:

1. The skin is considered our largest organ. So, all kinds of things can be absorbed into your skin and then your body. I once heard good advice on skin products (moisturizers, makeup, shampoo, etc.). "If you can't read it, don't eat it. If you can't eat it, don't wear it."

2. My children. I have always taught my children to "listen to their bodies". If something was telling them it isn't right, then listen. I want to be a role model and follow this same advice. Putting chemicals on my body doesn't feel right. Also, I want my children to believe that aging is a beautiful process and not one to be fearful of. All the changes that are seen on our body show the world our life experiences and accomplishments. Crow's feet are really just a sign that we laughed a lot, stretch marks that we were fortunate enough to bring life into this world, and gray hairs show the wisdom we have accumulated through our life journeys.

3. Appreciation for who I have become. The other day I watched three beautiful teenagers at the pool. Their bodies were perfectly free of fat, wrinkles, cellulite, age spots, etc. Their bodies were about as perfect as they will ever be. However, I saw an insecurity in them that I don't see in middle aged and older women. They don't yet feel comfortable in their own skins. As we age, we may not be happy with what has become of our bodies, but I think we learn to know our bodies and when I see women my age and older, I see a feeling of comfort they have found with their own body. I like that.

4. Friends. I have several friends who have chose to keep their natural hair color - grays and all! They are so beautiful.

5. Reading. I read four good articles that really helped motivate me to make this choice.
http://www.more.com/style/hair/gray-hair/
http://www.more.com/sex-dating/dating/gray-haired-woman-dating/
http://www.slate.com/id/2147054/
http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2008/05/24/can-hair-dyes-give-you-cancer.aspx

6. Lastly, the expense. I am getting tired of forking over $50 every eight weeks to cover up who I really am.

Zandyman 2008

Alexander, aka Zandy or Zandyman, turned 12 in May. One evening Sophia, Alexander and I were discussing an article in Mothering magazine about "Red Parties" which are a celebration of a girl starting her menstrual cycle. We liked the idea of celebrating this wonderful occassion but felt that when the time comes, we would prefer it to be more intimate, such as Sophia and I going out to eat as two women that have accomplished something great in life. Alexander thought this was a great idea too but was curious about how boys celebrated their entry into manhood. As unschoolers, we tend to follow what feels right for us. So, we started brainstorming. What would Alexander like to do? When would he do it? He knew for sure he wanted to do something alone with dad and we left it up to Alexander to know when he felt he was ready for this type of celebration.
Steve and Alexander both enjoy the mechanics of how a gun works and have talked about trying out skeet shooting. So, the morning after Alexander turned 12, they went skeet shooting. This was Alexander's first time of shooting a gun. They had so much fun. It was definitely a male bonding event for both Steve and Alexander.
It is an amazing thing to watch your son take on the responsibilities of a young man. He now mows our lawn, has a mother's helper job, is doing some dog sitting, helps around the house with anything and everything I need and he is taller than me. He is definitely a young man that I am proud to have as a son and friend.

Happy Birthday Sophia! Today is my daughter's birthday. Doesn't she have the most amazing smile? People always comment on how beautiful her smile is. It is an awesome feeling for other people to see that beauty in her.

Here comes the gray!

Look at the new colors coming out of my scalp! Every time I walk by a mirror, I feel this urge to bend my head over to look at the new hair. It is almost like watching a new building being erected. Here is a picture of my hair growth as of Saturday, my first missed "touch up" appointment. I was hoping there wouldn't be a lot of contrast in the colored hair and the new dark hair coming in, but I can now see that was very optimistic thinking. I will have the dreaded line around my head showing the world that I am trying to go natural.

Just What I Needed

I clicked on Louise Hay's daily affirmation. http://www.louisehay.com/affirmations/index.php Guess what it said?

"My body is always working toward optimum health."

I was feeling a little defeated this morning by the extra dose of stiffness I woke up to, but this is a nice reminder that my body does have the ability to heal. I feel better already with this thought!

Rain, Rain, Go Away!

Growing up in Kansas, the smell and feel of rain was always comforting to me. The sound of thunder and the sight of lightening felt so peaceful. Neighbors would gather outside to watch the skies and we would secretly hope for a power outage so we could sit in the dark with candles and our family.
I woke up earlier this morning to the sight of lightening. Unfortunately, the comforting feeling is gone. I was barely able to roll over in bed my body was so stiff. It feels sad to now dread something that once brought such peace.
The research on arthritis stiffness and weather seems to vary. My rheumatologist didn't seem to believe there was a correlation. However, my husband first noticed it with me. Whenever there is a shift in weather, my body stiffens up. I so want to trust my body to heal, but days like this feel like I have been defeated.